Tuesday, October 12, 2010 It's Rewind Time
It's not our anniversary. It's not my time of the month. It's not really any particular time at all, but I am feeling incredibly nostalgic and mushy. It hit me just the other day while driving that we are approaching our home a lot like we did our wedding, and now even our marriage. I decided it was time to really let you in and see the good the bad and the ugly behind our decision making and over all life - in general. We get about 85 people a day filling out the little form (on the right) and it's amazing how many people suggest we spout more about us! So here we go, the beginning (well kinda...)
We didn't rush into marriage by any means. I always knew Joey and I would get married, and I told him so right from the start (I was actually engaged when we met!). We went through two break ups, five (yes FIVE) apartments and a lot of time before we realized we really had something here. Something unbreakable and unstoppable. At this particular moment in life, we shared an apartment in Williamsburg Brooklyn. We didn't have too much space (1100 sqft to be exact), and we didn't have the ability to make this our home based on apartment living restrictions (ie my obsession with wallpaper) and all. We were growing out of our apartment, even before getting married. Now, we didn't expect to buy a house as soon as we did to be honest. With all the new development in Brooklyn, we figured we would find a nice townhouse with a little yard and call it a day. We looked into buying old schools, churches, and unusual properties, but found ourselves overwhelmed with the price + cost to renovate. After reviewing the newly developed properties, we felt a million bux was way too much to spend on something just slightly larger than our apartment. So for kicks we looked a bit north (15 miles to be exact) to Westchester County, NY and begin what we now call as "stalking". We drove around and ooooohed and aaaaaaaed all the amazing homes we figured we could never afford.
(we literally have a library of these, are we creepy?)
We drove around weekend after weekend wondering what the insides of the homes looked like, and one day I randomly called the number on a for sale sign, and we met our amazing Realtor, Mae. We told her we were just thinking about moving and gave her a randomly picked budget - just to get an idea. Well, our casual window shopping turned into an every-weekend-house-hunt. We looked at around 30 homes - we really loved them all, but each one lacked a bit of "us" in one way or another. Like picking out a wedding dress, there was an "it" factor that couldn't be explained which all these amazing homes lacked. Then, Mae showed us a home which had been on the market over a year. This was the house. We knew a lot of offers had been made, but for some reason every deal fell through. We fought tooth and nail for this house, it actually was my full-time job at the moment. Before we even got the house (which we almost loss three times), I was already packing boxes in our apartment. The mind-frame of "if you will it" was defiantly where we were at this moment. Then the call came with the closing date, which landed right in the middle of our honeymoon (which we skipped), and we were stoked to be homeowners. Everything changed after that.
Being city dwellers, we had a bit of a carefree life. We both have been lucky enough to have great careers, and we are both lucky enough to be business owners. We lived in a neighborhood which was ever changing and evolving making amenities super close and convenient. We kinda did what we wanted, when we wanted. From vacations, to fancy dinners, life was pretty easy. This was going to be a huge leap for us. We were comfortable with our overhead at the time, and this new house venture was going to take a new turn in our relationship. Communication was our new best friend. As I spoke about pounding out walls and adding French doors here and there, Joey was wondering how on earth we were going to pay for our new palace. This brought back memories of our wedding planning. This also made us realize we needed to reach a new level of our communication, it also addressed the issue of "who are we as a couple?". Let's rewind back to the wedding again.
When we approached our wedding, we naturally decided we would do it in New York. It would be easy for folks to get here, everyone loves a good NYC trip, and hey - it would be easy for us to plan close to home. Then we decided on someplace in Europe. Then we thought about a beach wedding in my home town in Florida. Then we looked at a few places upstate in the "woods". Then one day Joey woke up and said, Ten Sing Pen. I said "yes, perfect!". And that was that. We went from city chic, to classy Europe, to woodsy and beachy and then decided on a secluded village in Jamaica. Did I mention that before our wedding we got married in Vegas, with Elvis? That's a whole other story....
What's wrong with us? How do we hop all over the place? Who the heck are we? How do we make decisions? Haphazardly. That's how. The care-free-city-dweller/responsible-business-people oximornic life is what we are, it's who we are. It took a lot time for us to figure this out too. So it all eventually made sense to pick Jamaica, we just didn't realize it until over a year later. So we had a traditional wedding, constructed of only DIY projects, and handmade items, in a private village all the way on the west end of Negril, and people came, and had fun. A LOT of fun. We clashed two things that don't normally go together, and it worked and worked well. Friends came early and helped us piece together the bits of our wedding the nights before the wedding. We relaxed on the cliffs, crafted at night to iPod after iPod, swam in the ocean, played marco-polo until midnight. It felt like we were camping, just in a "our-own-private-island" kinda way.
We should have known at that moment when Joey said "TenSing Pen", the kind of people we were. At least as a couple. But it took more time and life experience before it was abundantly clear. We knew a few things:
- We like to make stuff
- fun and function can be one in the same
- We like having as many friends and family around, as much and as long as we can
- When we shop, it's rare we find things we LOVE
- We think old is better than new
- Life should be custom
So, when it came to life and living, who are we? We bought a 1930 traditional English tutor (after almost buying a Key West style vacation home in South Florida) and leaving a pretty modern styled Brooklyn apartment. After moving into the house, it felt like the wedding all over again. It's been almost a year (this month!) of reviewing paint chips, buying interior design books, shopping and building pieces here and there. Once again we woke up one day and realized, our home is going to be furnished "english-traditional-with-modern- flair". It's something we never figured we were, but together, it's what we have fallen in love with and now have as a goal for our home. I mean, hey, we both love London, we are both in love with tutor style homes, and Tim Oulton is our favorite furniture designer. It all made sense on one random day, and like everything else is our life - the decision came naturally.
At the end of the day we are non-traditional-traditional-English-design-loving-modern-spa-influenced-DIY-vintage folks. Even if all the TV shows and design books say this doesn't work, it works for us, and this is something we can stick to. It's OK to take the time and let your design style find you. I wish I knew this before we bought our home. It would have saved me a bunch of sleepless nights. It's also OK to be more than one thing. This I wish I knew back in high school! Accepting we are a "controlled mess" is the best thing we could have done for ourselves and our home.
